I feel like it was February, I blinked and it was December. As much as I try to really stay focused on “enjoying the moment in front of me”, I will be honest to say that this year was really a count down for me. The year probably went by in a blink from all the days I was counting down to my trip to NZ, to my last day of work, to Candle events, to when I started my Yoga course, to my Hens weekend, to my wedding day in November and it definitely went on my countdown to my Honeymoon holiday when I could sleep past 5am. What the hell was I thinking? There was something about last year 2017 being such a tough year through watching my late Uncle live with schizophrenia among other health issues and still was able to keep his cheeky loving inner child spark to the end, that really made me embrace life with the attitude that- it is short and so damn precious. And so, I said yes to everything this year.
Did I take on a lot? Perhaps. But it has been the most full-filling year of my life. Late last year I read a quote that absolutely changed my perspective.
“A year from now you’ll either be wishing you did all those things you said you wanted to do or you will have done them.”
For a long time I wanted to change my career path to doing something more meaningful and fulfilling to me. For me fulfilling meant waking up to a job that helped me and also helped others grow and meaningful meant it was something that dug beneath the surface. I feel very grateful to have found my Path. This for me was Yoga, Blogging & creating candles.
I sit here a year later from reading that quote- I am officially certified to teach Yoga, I went and checked out a spot to teach classes for next year, I am blogging and sent out my last of my Candle Gift boxes last week. I miss making coffee and funnily enough hearing people tell me about their family, kids, weekend, sex life (yes, this happens) all while waiting for their caffeine fix. I might make a comeback to the coffee life, I might fail miserably in my first yoga class, I might write a blog no one ever reads, or I could end up succeeding at all 3- you never know and this is LIFE.
Nothing goes to plan and life will always bring you challenges but one thing I know for sure is that a lot of life is what you choose to make of it.
I believe this to be the same for relationship, they can be as good or as bad as you make it to be. I could write a whole other blog about the journey from engaged to married this past year but that will be for another day.
Today I write to you instead of doing a NYE resolution list that let’s be honest, ends up under a pile of Uber eats a week later. I invite you to join me in reflecting on your year and writing down your biggest life lessons from 2018.
Lessons mean there has been growth, growth means there has been change.
So here we go, my life lessons from 2018:
1. Life is always happening FOR you not TO you.
This year has been a lot of changes in my personal life and a lot of moments of self-doubt and questioning myself in between making big and small choices which has been tough but like I said, this year has also been my most full-filling year of my life.
When I think back to this time of year for the past couple of years it has been a tough time for my family. With family losses, health issues etc it is hard to be bright-eyed at this time but it is even harder to not look around and be in absolute gratitude for life and the people by our side. It can be hard to think of how some things in life can be FOR you- in life, in love and in business, but the only other choice is to dwell and blame and who wants to live that way? Dwell and blame if you must-but do not stay there and let it consume you. Trust that there is always beauty in the tough days, you just have to look harder on those days. Something will always show up for you in life until you learn the lesson- learn it and move forward.
2. Health really is, our greatest wealth
I have lost family members and friends who have suffered from both physical and mental health illnesses. Every time I’ve lost someone a part of me says to myself…” you really need to take care of yourself.” I am not saying to become those people who eat about 7 seeds only but to be responsible for your health. If you know that sleeping 4 hours makes you a Grinch, then find a way to sleep better, if you know eating a certain food upsets you, then don’t eat it and if you do then don’t complain about it, if you know you’ve been feeling down and out- do not lie in bed hoping to feel better- go to the doctor, go OUTDOORS, do something. I use all of these as examples because I have done of all these things more than once or twice (definitely more). Don’t be stubborn. Listen to your body, you know it better than anyone. Don’t underestimate the small stuff- water, sleep, fruit & veggies.
3. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Don’t let pride or fear stop you from saying what’s on your heart.
This is a work in progress for me. But basically, saying yes when you mean it and being comfortable to say no when you mean it and asking for help when you need it. Telling people you love them, speaking up when there is something you don’t agree with or expressing to people in your life how much they mean to you. Don’t wait until their birthday or Christmas, be a rebel- tell them on a random Monday. Saying I love you has been a big one for me. I am not one to be comfortable to express emotion but life has sent me someone who teaches me every day that I need to soften, and then soften a little more. Thank you Oktay for telling me you love me every day. Thank you to my three brothers who end almost every phone call, message and goodbye with “love you”. Thank you for the soul baring conversations. My mum and I are so alike in this way and it is funny that it has been these young men in my life who have softened me and shown me the beauty in vulnerability.
4. Be what you want to see more of in this world.
Be kind, Be compassionate and Be loving. There is so much suffering in this world already- why add to it by being envious, hateful, ungrateful, cruel? Do not let the experiences of your life harden you, let it open you to be more loving because you know what it’s like to have been at rock bottom. At the end of my yoga course we shared in a closing circle our takeaway from the course. Through teary eyes I shared how beautiful it was to connect on such a deep level with these people who 4 weeks before were strangers to me. They shared their darkest times in a room full of people who they didn’t even know and there they were-wanting to learn how they can take their darkness and share light in this world. Everyone is going through something, everyone has a story, everyone has light within them- often It takes another to recognise it before they themselves can find it.
Thank you for sharing my blog journey this year and cannot wait to see what lessons have come for you & what adventures await you in 2019! Be safe, Be kind & Be loving- especially to yourself.
Happy New Year Friends & Family!
I love you all, Flo xxx